One of the biggest miracles I ever experienced in my life occurred eight years ago when Pearl came to the United States and we got married. It is our anniversary tomorrow and I want to spend a little time writing about our marriage.
A Very Important Day To Us
You see, our anniversary is a very important day to us. We actually started celebrating on Monday but our anniversary date isn’t until Thursday.
Why the big hoopla?
Because Pearl and I have old fashioned, traditional values when it comes to marriage. Our marriage is our life. The only thing more important to us is our faith in Jesus Christ…and even that is something that we live out together.
We work together. We eat together. We play together. We do almost everything together.
In fact, most people find this surprising, but we actually go to bed together and wake up in the morning together. There is no Eddie Lewis without Pearl…no such thing. We might as well be connected at the hips. The only time we are apart is when I have a gig (musicians’ wives know that going to gigs with their hubbies soon becomes a major drag).
This is not a very popular way to live today, and I think that’s part of the reason why we celebrate our anniversary so much.
Vive la Difference!
I like being different. I like that what we have is different. It’s not only that we are together almost all the time. It’s more than that. We spend our days together striving to live according to our beliefs and principals. Our anniversary dinner date is a good example of what I’m talking about.
On American standards, Pearl and I do not eat out much. She cooks most of our meals and we don’t need to go out as often as most other people we know. So we limit our restaurant meals to certain special occasions.
But even that sounds different from what it really is. I’m not saying that, on special occasions we go out to enjoy a good meal. Not at all. I’m saying that, on special occasions I take Pearl out to eat so she doesn’t have to cook on that day. What Pearl makes for us at home is, in my opinion, far, far better than what we eat in restaurants.
But yes, on special celebration days, I like to treat her to something nice that she doesn’t have to cook.
Anyway, getting to the point…
This year I wanted to take Pearl to Monument Inn, but it’s a bit more expensive there than what we usually get. You see, that’s part of our story. We work together at living frugal lives. This is one of those principled things I was writing about earlier. We believe in being good stewards of what God has blessed us with. So even when we do eat out, we try to use coupons or eat at less expensive restaurants.
That means, in order to take Pearl to Monument Inn, we decided to not eat out at all for the three months leading up to our anniversary.
Monthly Lunch Dates
Pearl and I typically eat out for one lunch date per month, on the same date as our wedding anniversary. It’s a tradition we started a year before she moved here from South Africa.
For the past three months, Pearl and I chose to do OTHER things to celebrate “Our Day”. The picture of Pearl above was taken on “Our Day” a month ago when we went on a drive to the beach. We did something of a Galveston Beach nature tour. He he he… In fact, that was a nice break from just sitting at a restaurant.
The good news is that we can go to Monument Inn tomorrow and enjoy a nice meal and do it without feeling like we are spending too much money. We won’t have to pick cheap items off the menu or skip the desserts.
I Love This Part of Who We are
I am in no way suggesting that our marriage is finished growing. We haven’t reached marital nirvana or anything like that. But this is something that I really love about who we are as husband and wife. We strive to live according to our beliefs. Even though we haven’t perfected our married lives yet, with God’s grace, we are moving in the right direction.
A Head Start With Festivities
One of the things we don’t do at home is deep fried food. That’s one of the reasons we are going to Monument Inn tomorrow. Almost everything else we eat at any restaurant is something Pearl can make us at home.
Whenever we do go out, Pearl will ask me what I like about the meal. It’s not long after when she is making the same dish for me at home. Check this out:
This is a picture of Pearl using fresh herbs from our garden to make her version of Olive Garden’s potato soup (Zuppa Toscana). Like I said, celebrations began on Monday and we won’t be slowing down until my first student on Saturday morning.
Another goodie Pearl made for me this week is shortbread cookies. I have loved shortbread cookies since I got to make them for the entire school in jr. high school. However, Walkers cookies are very expensive. So once again, Pearl did some homework and every once in a while makes a batch of cookies that taste even better than Walkers! One batch is like $30 worth of cookies if they had been bought in the stores.
Can’t Do It Without Pearl
Pearl and I believe in what we call “Traditional Marriage”. I unashamedly stand before you as the head of our home. This is something we talked about for two years before we married. We both have desired this kind of marriage all of our lives and now we are living it out.
And I know from experience (this is where I clear my throat and look around the room for knowing glances), that traditional marriages are impossible if only one side desires to live this way. We wouldn’t have a traditional marriage if Pearl wasn’t an active player on our team. I hope that makes sense.
My yearly anniversary message is always about celebrating Pearl, and I’m sure that this blog post probably seems to be talking more about me than about her. But that’s the point I am trying to make. We’ve been living this close for eight years now. The line between Pearl and I is becoming increasingly more vague. There is no more Eddie Lewis. There is no more Pearl Lewis (Berndt). We are one! Not just in theory. Not just in sentiment. But in a very real and practical way. We are one.
This year I am celebrating HER by celebrating US and the life we have lived together. She has given me the kind of marriage we both think is good and right. And it’s working for us.
Thank you Pearl for eight delightful years. I’m looking forward to the rest of our lives together.